Are you frustrated with others, yet overlooking your contribution to the result? One way to identify a skill set for you to improve is to examine any area or aspect in your life that irks you or you find perpetually difficult. There’s a high probability you are hiding behind excuses and avoiding looking at the real issue.
Excuses are the major cause of our getting in our own way. The challenge can be in recognizing the excuses instead of rationalizing them as reality. How do you get in your own way? In a recent program for professional women that are federally employed, a couple of women initially said they never got in their own way. Ironically, that response is proof otherwise. As the session continued they uncovered a variety of fears, self-imposed limitations and skill sets to improve that were up to that point serving as their stumbling blocks.
Do you have something you’d like to say, yet keep stifled due to fear or lack of skill to express properly – personally or professionally? If this is you, you are not alone. In the last month, this has been the common theme among my coaching clients, ranging from top executives to independent contractors. The only difference is if you’ve decided to take the necessary steps to resolve your barriers.
Each client gained eye-opening insights into the problems they previously believed were caused by someone else, took appropriate action and created new results.
When a mid-level manager realized his irritation with a superior was directly correlated to his own behavior, he took ownership of his role in the interaction so his stress decreased and his skills improved.
When a contract employee gained confidence and learned how to address an awkward situation on a personal level, his focus professionally improved so he was more productive and increased his bottom line.
When a top executive drew the parallel to her response toward an employee’s behavior, she implemented the change in herself in order to capitalize on her role and support the development of her staff member.
When a working professional facing a personal challenge identified a work situation that had been being ignored, he embarked on corrective action steps so he moved beyond his excuse of procrastination and got things done!
Imagine uncovering the real root of what isn’t working as you would like. What would your life be like to overcome the obstacles that prevent the results you seek? When you remove the barriers, you create the freedom necessary to get you unstuck. Then naturally, once the resistance or limitation is eliminated, forward progress can occur.
Three essential keys to moving you forward:
Be willing to do whatever it takes, including hiring the necessary support you need, to get truly honest with yourself. Hiding behind facades (consciously or unconsciously) is a sure way to keep you stuck.
Visualize or imagine the desired outcome. It is very important to engage the emotions you will have in the experience. Recall a time you were annoyed at a person or situation. More than likely you replayed that scenario over several times in your head and as you did you relived; and in many cases, intensified; the associated feelings. How often do you utilize this same technique regarding results you want to create?
ACTION! You will never achieve targets or goals without proper and consistent action in the direction of your aspirations. If you believe you are taking action, yet question if you’re getting anywhere, you either are taking the wrong action for your target or you have confused busy activity with appropriate action. Either way, the best solution is to consult a coach or expert to help get you on track and to stay the course.
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