Do you have a person in your life you could do without? How much is this person the focus of your attention? Are you enjoying the results you’re experiencing?
Isn’t it ironic how we claim to want certain people out of our lives and yet we constantly put our focus on them? Wherever we put our focus is what grows. Did you ever replay a conversation in your head? Probably not a positive one – there’s no time for that! Or, if and when we replay a positive interaction, we seem not to remember many of the fine points.
A negative conversation on the other hand we can recall every minute detail. The words, the tone, the facial expressions – even the intent – we relive every moment. Actually, rarely if ever do we truly know someone’s intent even though we convince ourselves that we do!
Focusing on people we claim to rather not have in our life is like being the bug and expecting the windshield to feel the affect!
Where’s your focus? We both know the solution is simple – Shift the focus! I hear the immediate rebuttals – it’s not that easy! You’re right AND I never said it was easy. Do not confuse simple and easy. That’s not the issue. The question is – Is it possible? Yes – and you’ve already done it! How?
Have you ever had a person in your life you could do without and finally realized neither of you were going anywhere? That person is still in your life but they no longer faze you? Who changed? How did your life improve? How did you make that change?
One of the points emphasized in Communicating Beyond Differences is that we often already know the answer but refuse to apply the concept on a regular basis. Why? Because for some reason we seem to get great satisfaction in holding the mirror to others instead of ourselves. I believe this is so we avoid taking responsibility for our own lives.
As a Recovering Excuse Maker™ I hope never to be recovered. Do you find that perplexing? Here is the blessing (remember last last month’s newsletter?) in that desire. I get a daily reprieve from insanity (doing the same thing over and over expecting a different result) based on my choices. Have you noticed our level of consciousness does not determine if we experience the results of our choices? That means I need to be conscientious and function from a place of heightened awareness. Only in that place do we own our choices instead of blaming or living numb.
Take a look at your life. What do you think? So, where’s your focus?